Tuesday, November 07, 2006

I am totally out of whack. I am completely lost in perception. I don't know why, or how I can allow my self to utterly lose my focus when trying to accomplish goals. Actually that's not the truth, actually I know exactly how, cause I constantly see myself do it, but I get this feeling of indifference that comes over me. Its come to the point where I am convinced that I cant finish something unless I see it through without interruption. I feel like if I where a recovering alcoholic that dying for a shot that he knows will send me into a tailspin.

OK that was a last week I believe. Today I have a new view of the situation. Last weeks part has some relevancy to today's topic but its just a small part. The first half of this year, my time was taken up by my desire to explore the spiritual side of my humanity. I did and still don't know much about it for that matter but i made some significant strides. My mind was clear, my heart was in the right place, my morals were unquestioned. Then little by little I came down from that cloud I was on. As the days went by, the desire to explore and search and the need to find what I sought slowly slipped through my minds fingers.

As the time passed I hardly noticed the changes taking place. I became complacent with my life and fell through the cracks. I didn't even care to blog anymore and that had been one of my greatest outlets. A place to tell the world how Aldo Jose BendaƱa Gurdian Monterey Lopez viewed the world! Itsridiculous how people (me) can be on such a high about something new in their life and then just forget it altogether. Its actually sad, but enough of that sort of talk. I am on the road to recovery, (i am a drunk, J/K) and it starts today with this post. No more meaningless mumbo jumbo. All I got left to say is Where my dogs at?!

5 comments:

Marianita said...

woof woof!

Andre said...

'Sup Aldo-ito. Been a while, dawg.

I understand where you're coming from. Life can get pretty overwhelming at times, which makes it easier to forget about the "highs" in life. The joy that comes with having your first born child can diminish if it's born with a deforminty. The excitement of getting your first job can be extinguished by having a boss/co-workers who are jerks. The new car you get from your recently purchase vehicle can be replaced by the smell of smoke and gas after somebody crashes into you. Maybe these examples were a little grim, but I think you get the point.

I think that the only plausible solution is to step back for a second, take a breath and come back to it. Sometimes it's the 'time off' from things (i.e. blogging or the other "highs" you have) that make you appreciate them more.

That's what I think anyway...

Michigan - 24
Ohio State - 10

DobyD said...

Go Blue! I need them to win and then i need notre dame and usc to lose since everyone hates the gators.

thanks for the post.

Andre said...

Well, well, well. Look who's finally starting to realize the power behind the ole Maize and Blue.

On second thought, I think I'll hold off on rubbing things in until after the game. You never know what to expect in Columbus...

Aside from heated college football rivalries and wacky BCS systems, how ya been?

DobyD said...

Pretty up and down, but what else is new right? Hows the church hunting going, found any new prospects?